The scan yesterday was fine, the baby appears to be growing well & I’m approaching 16 weeks. I have another scan in 2 weeks but I’m already feeling anxious.

It is hard to check the hb with the children around, I don’t want them to know yet.

We visited Toby’s grave last week and took him some flowers. It was sad. There are eight new babies buried there now :(

It’s a scary time. I want to make it through the next few weeks, we last heard Toby’s heart beat at 15+6, at 16+1 it wasn’t there. I’m 15+4 today.

Even if we get past that milestone it doesn’t mean anything - there was no reason for Toby to die at 16 weeks, there’s no reason for this one not to die either.

Very weird - trying to believe it can be different.